Now, In today's lesson, we're going to get "hands
on" and discover how to construct the perfect email to solicit those
"diamonds in the rough" that are undoubtedly priceless and instrumental
to your sales and profits.
But first, I want to
make one thing perfectly clear...
By adding fake
testimonials to your website, you're not only breaking the law, but
you're also lying to your customers and that's no way to run a
successful business.
That leads me to a funny story
that I think you'll find amusing...
Oh... I almost
forgot...
Before you read the story, I just
wanted to give you a quick reminder.
Never Lie To A Customer...
Or You Just Might
End Up Looking Like a Jackass!
Back in the early 80's... my
brother-in-law was working as a ticket agent for a major airline in the
US, and frequently, as part of his job responsibility, he would take
care of a select group of VIP customers who traveled quite often with
the airline. These customers were considered an "elite" class
and were given special attention at all times just to help insure
they'd continue to fly exclusively with the airline.
One such "VIP" was an 86 year old woman -- an
"independently wealthy" socialite from the west coast who traveled a
lot... mostly for enjoyment, vacations, visiting relatives and
attending "non-profit" events where she generously donated funds to
worldly charitable causes, etc.
For
the sake of this story, I'll refer to her as Mrs. Morris. And
rest assured... she was a "sweetheart" of a lady from what my
brother-in-law has told me.
Anyway,
on this one particular day, my brother-in-law was busy registering
airline passengers behind the ticket counter when he noticed a peculiar
situation erupting which seemed to be getting more and more chaotic as
time passed...
Mrs. Morris was
in - what seemed to be - a very troubled state, pleading her case
vigorously to several airline officials....
"I want to bring Juliet on the flight
with me!" She was yelling...
"If
you don't allow me to take her aboard... I'll take my business to
another Airline!"
"She
won't be any trouble at all!"
Just so
you understand... Juliet was her dog... and not just any
"dog". She was her princess.
Anyone could tell this just from observing Mrs. Morris and Juliet
together in the past...
Juliet's pet carrier was adorned
with gemstones along all four corners and the front door of the carrier
appeared to be made of what looked like 14K gold.
A
plush red velvet blanket covered the entire four star "pet-house suite"
and a slot was precisely cut in the top of the coverlet that allowed
the ivory embossed handle to slip through conveniently to make it easy
to carry.
In addition, the words "Juliet The Princess"
were hand sewn into the velvet blanket with golden thread, big and
bold, allowing the whole world to see it.
Mrs. Morris wouldn't let the carrier out
of her site... after all Juliet was her "Baby" and she was obviously
very over-protective of her. She was adamant that Juliet be
allowed to board the flight with her this one time!
"Please... she begged. You
don't understand. I just want to take her aboard with me just
this one time. She's been very sick and I brought her here to
New York to see her Vet. He's one of the finest Veterinarians
in the entire country you know? And now, we both just want to
be together and get home! It's been a long two days."
Behind the ticket counter, most of the
airline workers were watching and wondering who'd win the battle...
-- VIP Frequent Flyer vs. Big Shot Airline?
Everyone realized that the airline
officials didn't EVER want to have to tell someone of her status -
"SUPER VIP" - the word NO!
So
there she was... the gentle ole soul, pleading her case to one manager
after another - in what was obviously a futile effort - each appeal
falling upon another set of "deaf ears".
And
as much as the airline representatives wanted to accommodate her...
they simply could not.
The VP
of public relations even got involved and expressed his apologies for
the inconvenience, but stood firmly on their policy...
"I'm sorry Mrs. Morris." He
explained...
"You
know I'd do anything within my power to accommodate you and Juliet...
but I simply cannot allow any pets on board the flight. I'm
sure you understand... We'll be more than happy to assign a special
agent to tend to Juliet and be sure she's treated with nothing but
loving, tender care. In our eyes, Juliet is a VIP too."
The Customer
Relations Supervisor continued to assure the kind, woman that "Juliet"
would be fine with the other pets... and upon arrival in Seattle...
someone from the airline would be waiting with "Juliet" as soon as she
got off the plane.
"I'll
call ahead to Seattle right now... Mrs. Morris. I'll inform
our VIP department of the situation. Everything will be just
fine! Now, you go take care of your boarding and we'll take
GREAT care of Juliet... Okay?"
Mrs.
Morris realized she was defeated so she reluctantly agreed to allow
Juliet to fly in the pet compartment of the plane...
So... away went "Juliet" (in her plush pet
carrier) in the gentle hands of one of the airline employees, and the
ticket agent proceeded to check Mrs. Morris in... and then continued to
help her board the airline.
The
flight went smoothly from coast to coast...
Upon arrival in Seattle, the impeccably dressed
woman exited the tunnel with the rest of the passengers and proceeded
to wait anxiously for the airline personnel to reunite her and Juliet
once again.
V.I.P personnel
greeted Mrs. Morris with a warm welcome and kept her abreast of the
situation as the minutes ticked by...
"Just
a few more minutes Mrs. Morris... and we'll have Juliet here... and
then you two can be on your way."
Would you like us to call for a cab or
do you have a driver waiting?"
"Is
there anything we can get for you while you wait?"
"We're sorry for the delay but it
should only be a few more minutes..."
They continued to pamper Mrs. Morris while they
all waited impatiently for Juliet's arrival...
A Big Problem!
Now...
I'm not quite sure of the exact procedure for "de-boarding" pets from
an airline, but at some point while the airline was taking the pets out
of the plane and inspecting each animal... to their shock and horror they
discovered that Juliet did not survive the flight home!
The panic set in immediately.
Staffers were running around frantic trying to make some sense of the
horrific situation.
How were
they going to tell her? Who would tell her?
Someone had to tell sweet little ol' Mrs.
Morris that "the love of her life" didn't make it.
But who? Who'd break the news?
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
- - -
Sidebar
Just to reiterate... this story
is 100% true. I can't name the airline by name -- but I can
tell you that they were one of the most popular airlines in the sky
back in the 80's.
It
just goes to show you that even some of the largest companies in the
world can sometimes stoop to unscrupulous measures to try and save
their own A$$...
-
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Anyway... I guess some "high ranking" airline
official got a "hair-brained" idea.
He
was afraid that if they broke the news to this 86 year old woman in the
airport, not only would they lose her business forever (and a lot of
business to boot) but the news might also kill her as well - right on
the spot.
So they opted for a
Plan-B...
Stall! Come
up with a plan so we could think the situation through...
The Plot Thickens...
Ironically... upon further inspection of
the dog to try and figure out what happened, they realized that Juliet
was a pure bred, pure white "Poodle".
Hmmm!
That might be a plus...
As
unbelievable at it sounds... some "brain-dead" airline official thought
he could out-smart this woman. He decided to tell her that
Juliet was accidentally placed on the wrong flight.
"I don't know how to tell you this
Mrs. Morris... but Juliet was mistakenly placed on the wrong flight..."
"I can't begin to imagine how
upset you must be, and you have my word that I'll personally rectify
the situation immediately! Rest assured Mrs. Morris...
someone will be FIRED over this!..."
"You have my word that I'll assign a
representative to locate Juliet immediately and we will personally
deliver her to your home later this evening or early tomorrow morning."
The poor old woman was frantic.
She nearly passed out from the news. She was horrified,
shocked, dismayed... But what choice did she have?
Being reassured that Juliet would be located
and returned to her ASAP, she painstakingly agreed to their proposal
and went home to anxiously await Juliet's return.
So What Would The Airline Do Now?
Back at the ranch, the entire airline was
in a complete panic. They decided to send a few
representatives out into the local town to try and find a white
"Poodle" that looked exactly like Juliet.
YUP!
An imposter... Shame.. Shame... Shame...
They
assumed that because the woman was so old, her eyesight failing
miserably, her memory probably fading fast... that they had a 50/50
chance to pull it off and pass off a new dog as Juliet.
Was it worth the risk? Obviously they
thought so...
And low and
behold... after a whole day of relentless searching, they felt they'd
found the perfect imposter.
Same
size... same age... same color... same distinctive marking on
her left paw... The perfect twin! How lucky... And how clever!
Brilliant... they thought!
Now all they needed to do was place the
imposter in the plush pet carrier and deliver the resurrected "Juliet"
to the little old woman's home immediately.
Would The Plan Work?
Two representatives from the airline drove
out to the the small town outside of Seattle to reunite Juliet with
Mrs. Morris.
They nervously
stepped up onto the porch and rang the bell. After a few
seconds, Mrs. Morris answered the door with sheer excitement...
"OH Juliet my love... you're home at last!"
But to the horror of the two airline reps,
when Mrs. Morris opened the pet carrier door, an immediate look of
horror came upon her face...
"This
isn't Juliet!"
Acting
as though they hadn't a clue about what she was talking about, the two
airline reps immediately began petting the imposter and praising the
cute little "Doggie"...
"You
were such a good girl... Juliet!" You really missed your
mamma... didn't you?
And
one of the airline reps responded...
"What
do you mean, Mrs. Morris"?
Mrs.
Morris replied back in a stern voice...
"This
isn't Juliet! Where's my precious little Juliet?"
"No, no Mrs. Morris... You must
be mistaken... Of course this is Juliet."
Mrs. Morris once again replied back with even
more concern and disbelief in her voice...
"Well
then gentlemen... your airline must fly high up into the heavens...
Because Juliet was put to rest yesterday by her Veterinarian and I was
simply bringing her back home to bury her!"
The moral to the story...
Never Lie To A Customer --
No Matter How Difficult The Situation May Seem... Because In The End...
Chances Are You'll End Up Looking Like A Jackass -- and even
worse... losing a customer FOREVER!
I
sure hope you got a chuckle out of it...
